


Something Worth Living For

by WaitAThousandYears



Category: South Park
Genre: Angst, Field trip to Hell, Hell has a Stabucks, Hope, Other, Satan's new boyfriend, Snarky little shit, Son of Satan, Whoops Kenny's dead again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-01-02
Packaged: 2017-11-23 09:35:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaitAThousandYears/pseuds/WaitAThousandYears
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kenny is tired of dying but a talk with Damien reminds him that there are things worth living for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something Worth Living For

“Kenny McCormick” a voice calls and I take my place at the front of the line.   
The voice is unfamiliar to me today.  
“Frozen in an industrial freezer?” The man looks up from his Domesday Ledger. He doesn't even bother to hide his surprise. I smirk, nodding slightly and he coughs, returning to his paperwork. All business again.  
“Very well. Enter” He states and I struggle not to laugh at his attempt at being authoritative.  
I leave the line, passing over the threshold into Hell for what seems like the millionth time. You know you've made some poor life decisions when dying has become a bad habit.  
When I was younger, death wasn't a concern of mine. I'd get lit on fire, or hit by a car or stepped on by Mecha Streisand. I'd take a short vacation to Hell, do some sunbathing by the Styx and then head back to South Park for more adventuring.  
And no one would even notice I'd left.   
Back then, I just assumed that no one cared that I'd died because they always knew I'd come back. Then Damien opened my eyes to the truth- I'd die and they'd forget. They'd mourn my while I was gone and as soon as I'd return they'd forget that I'd ever died.  
For years it didn't bother me. But after a while that began to change. These days I see it as nothing but a curse. And in a way it feels like no one remembers because nobody cares.  
“Oh, fantastic. It's you again. Must be Wednesday.” Startled out of my reverie I realise that I've walked for far longer than I thought.  
Standing mere feet away from me, leaning against the grey wall of a gritty building is Damien. My one source of company here.  
“Of course I'm back. As if you could go more than a week without seeing my sexy ass.” I wink flirtatiously at the demon. He rolls his eyes and pushes away from his perch.   
A neon sign catches my eye.  
“Starbucks? Really?” I ask, gesturing towards the building behind him. He shrugs, taking a packet of cigarettes from his pocket and lighting one.  
“What do you expect? Everyone knows that Starbucks is made with coffee beans and pure evil. I'm just surprised we're only getting one now.” he replies. I laugh and sling my arm around his shoulders, noting with satisfaction that he's still shorter than me.  
Damien mutters angrily beside me.  
“Something wrong, sunshine?” I ask teasingly.  
A burst of flame erupting from a nearby crater.  
I really should have learned that antagonising the son of Satan is a really bad idea.  
“Sorry, sorry” I laugh. “Seriously though, what's wrong?”  
“Dad has another new boyfriend.” He says, gritting his teeth in irritation.  
I sigh. “Another terrorist?” I say sympathetically. You'd think that talking about the Devil's love life would never become something I could casually talk about, but there you go.  
Damien nods in exasperation.  
“Well, at least it's not Osama bin Laden.” I laugh.  
He stays silent.  
“Oh, my God. It IS bin Laden.” I say, and it become near impossible not to burst out in hysterics.  
Damien growls furiously.  
“That is just too funny. But maybe it's time YOU brought home a boyfriend.” I suggest and I'm only half joking.  
He looks so unimpressed by the idea that I can't resist taking it further.  
“You know that I'm always willing to help you out, babe.” I purr, moving my arm from his shoulders to around his waist. I briefly consider grabbing his ass, though the homicidal waves radiating from him make be reconsider. I rather like not being a eunuch.  
All jokes aside, it's a shame. I never thought that Lucifer's son would grow up to be shit hot, but I was pleasantly surprised. I've heard he's a great lay too, but I'm not sure how trustworthy Christophe is.  
I remove my arm when I decide that he's about four seconds away from removing my testicles with a rusty scissors.  
Damien's scary sometimes.  
“Good move, McCormick.” He practically spits.  
“I'm rather attached to my balls, thanks.” I reply and he nods.  
Sometimes I'm afraid of how easily I can know what he's thinking.  
We begin walking again and after a while Damien's voice pierces the silence.  
“I wish I could go back with you.”  
He speaks so quietly that if I didn't know him as well as I do, I'd think I'd misheard.  
“I know.” I reply sadly.  
Damien sighs and for a moment I feel truly regretful that there's nothing I can do to help.  
“I'll send you home now” he offers and he comes to a stop.  
“Aww, you sick of me already?” I tease and he laughs weakly.  
I feel a familiar sensation as a white glow envelopes my body.  
“I'll see you soon then.” I say, smiling.  
And then I'm home.  
I sit up on my bed and survey my room without any real interest. A knock sounds on my bedroom door and Kevin opens it before I even have time to answer.  
“Your friends and the fat kid are looking for you.” he says and he disappears towards the living room. I leave my bedroom and head for the front door.  
“Hey, Kenneh! Where the fuck did you go?!” Cartman yells.  
“Yeah, dude. You missed Clyde pulling up Bebe's skirt!” Kyle says.  
I laugh and shut the front door behind me, joining my best friends and Cartman on the lawn.  
Maybe no one remembers that I've died, but at least I always have something worth come b


End file.
